Of Tears And Books And Things

This is one of those scattered, all over the place entries.

A few days ago, I was curled up on the spare bed with Vic, hibernating as the wind and rain tossed themselves together all around the house. We had the West Coast version of a winter storm, which bascially means, a hella lotta rain. I had some time off — praise all the small gods, our company has a bereavement policy, so I took two days off to just … well … deal.

So I holed up with my baby and a blanket and my crochet and the tv and the heater and watched the rain fall, and the sun set pale white gold one evening, which was powerfully bizarre, but beautiful.

The catharsis finally came about on Monday … I think it was Monday. I’d been snappish and mean to Sabs and was trying to apologize, when the sobs started and the tears followed. I cried for about 20 minutes I think, all the built up anger and frustration and sads just washing right on out of me. Whoosh.

Though there’s still sadness it’s not looming over me anymore. It’s in perspective and I feel a lot better for it.

In other news, our very kind friends very generously gave us a fat gift certificate for amazon.com. We’ve decided to split it three ways and get one thing for Sabs, one thing for me, and one thing for Vic, for Christmas. Though actually the thing for Sabs is more like a thing for Sabs and I, ‘cos we’re both Brust fans. To make a long story short, we’re getting the new Brust book for Christmas. We’re still discussing which toy to get Vic, though I’m pretty sure we’ve settled on the large, stuffed snake that coils around baby and has rattles and squeakers and crinkly things in its sections. As for myself, I don’t know what to get.

I just popped onto my Amazon.com page and figured I’d flip through my recommendations page to see if anything else new and cool was out in the SFF world other than the new Brust book, but my page seems to have been taken over by aliens and there are no SFF recommendations in sight, anywhere on it. It’s all parenting this, and childbirth that with a little bit of knitting and crochet tossed in for kicks.

Gee. I wonder what I’ve been buying lately. *snort*

Oh and if you’re a Bay Area friend and are good at sneaking into hotels and want to see me make an idiot of myself, our office party is this Friday at the Westin and I will be singing not one, but three songs in the karaoke contest. One of them is Peggy Lee’s Fever. Yes. That one. May the Divine Spirit help me.