Calls You Don’t Want To Get

I’m sitting here at my desk grumbling a little over the 11am meeting that was cancelled that I shuffled my whole morning around for, when the phone rings.

“Hello, this is Victor’s teacher at Preschool. And before I explain what happened, I just want you to know that Victor is just fine.”

I’ve started conversations on the phone with my mother like this before. Notably when I got into a car accident while interning at NATO in Brussels when I was 18. I called her and woke her up in the middle of the night going “Hi Mom, it’s me, I’m fine.” So of course she immediately sat up going “Oh my God! What’s wrong?”

Well, now it’s my moment. My heart kind of stopped and I took a deep breath while his teacher went on.

“Victor found a dead rat on the playground and Victor being Victor of course, he put its tail in his mouth.”

“Oh my God!” were the first words out of my mouth.

I’m now going twenty rounds between the school and the pediatrician’s office trying to figure out if we need to bring Vic in for testing, if we need to bring the rat in for testing, or if I just need to sternly remind my son, that we do not, under any circumstances, eat random dead animals off the ground.

As his teacher said, this is probably only the beginning of all the wonderful adventures Victor is going to get us into over the years to come.

My laughter right now is a little hysterical, but at least I can still laugh. For now.

5 thoughts on “Calls You Don’t Want To Get

  1. Argh! Bleah! Urgh!

    When I had my chemistry class accident in high school, the teacher told the secretary that Mom was “excitable,” so the secretary called and said, “Mrs. Armstrong, this is Carrie’s school. Are you sitting down?…I really think you should be sitting down…”

  2. Heh. Yeah. After the initial moment of panic, I just couldn’t stop laughing. It’s just … so very Victor. Apparently, he was … kind of sort of … mock-scaring the other kids with this rat tail.

    When I asked him about it later though, he told me “Mouse sick” so I think he might have been trying to ah … comfort it or make it better or something.

  3. I just need to sternly remind my son, that we do not, under any circumstances, eat random dead animals off the ground.

    I’m glad everything’s okay, and I have to say that that bit quoted above made me laugh out loud. 🙂

  4. Hi Beth,
    How are you?

    I was reading your blog with great interest (I love stories). You have a lot of facinating and interesting content and you are a very talented writer.
    I am Multimedia student at CSUEB. I am working on a Oakland based storytelling website (student project)
    Please check it out at:

    We are looking for local writers to submit a story (or stories) connected or related in some shape of form to Oakland or Lake Merritt.
    It can be fiction, fact or even both and there are many genres to choose from. If you have any stories (no matter how short), it would be great to read them. You can also link to your other work from your story.

    Please let me know what you think!

    Kind Regards,

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